One of the most popular pop culture questions being asked this week is who should replace Joy Behar on The View. I most likely won't watch whoever it is since Elizabeth Hasselbeck is a right-wing Stepford wife, Whoopi's "sister act" has grown as tired as she looks, Sherri Springfield is a babbling Jesus freak and Barbara Walters insists on constantly talking about sex which makes me want to run to the bathroom every single time. But there are a few choices that would shake up the panel enough to make the cat fur fly.
Kathy Griffin--Unless hell freezes over, there is no way the vulgar comedienne extraordinaire will ever be invited to the panel. But it would be must-see TV to watch Hasselbeck's, Springfield's and Walter's heads spin like Exorcist stunt doubles. And it may even put a whoopee cushion under Goldberg, who has an Oscar for actually being funny, something you don't see at play on this show at all.
Chelsea Handler--Another late-night choice known for her off-color humor, the reasons she would be a gold-star addition are the same as Griffin's. However, since it's doubtful the Vodka-hawking star even wakes up before noon, so morning TV is probably not in the cards for her.
Kirstie Alley--A realistic possibility since Alley has an emptier plate than Handler or Griffin, aside from a cable comedy series that won't take that long to film. Any woman who has thanked her husband at an awards show for his "big one" would be a breath of fresh air, where flatulence jokes, usually thanks to Whoopi, are considered hilarity. And on Dancing With the Stars, she handled the difficult Maks effortlessly and brought out the Ukrainian dancer's charm.
These are the big three. Ali (I sleep with George Stephanopoulos) Wentworth and Pretty Baby Brooke Shields are boring and more realistic choices for a show I stopped watching the moment after Rosie O'Donnell and Hasselbeck provided this train wreck of a moment.
Still, the venerable Walters deserves any article mentioning her creative baby to end on a positive note. See Katherine Hepburn answering perhaps the finest interview question ever, "If you were a tree, what tree would you be?" Barbara blames the incident on Hepburn, rather than taking ownership of this fantastic highlight of her long career, showing that her "view" has definitely gotten foggier with age, but what a view it was.
As I'm usually a little late to the party, it's no surprise that I am just now obsessed with The Rachel Zoe Project, which just began it's fifth season on Bravo. While I have no use for the Kardashians or the billion Housewives haunting the airwaves, Zoe is a fresh, strong feminine heroine with real skills and life smarts.
The first episode detailed Fashion Week in New York City, which is a big deal for fashion designers' careers. The show keeps the action moving, following Rachel and her fashion team as they get her collection together. Flowers for the backdrop of the show actually make for decent drama shockingly.
The key in all of this is Rachel. She remains an intriguing presence, and not just because she looks like the lovechild of Fergie and Michelle Pfeiffer. She's stubborn and demanding, yet insecure and needy. However, she manages all of these sides of her personality with something sorely missing from most reality stars--star-powered charisma.
Another big draw of this show is that her husband, Rodger Berman, seems to really have her back. This is on the basis of one episode. However, they have been married since 1996, so he is doing something right. They share a sparky chemistry. And, let's face it, he's hot.
And then there is the kid, Skyler, who Rachel keeps fashionably dressed in Burberry, which results in a cute little bit of banter between Rodger and Zoe.
It's a really strong show with a feminine protagonist I would not mind my daughter watching, if I were ever to procreate. The world can have their Housewives and Mob Wives and Sister Wives--I'll be watching a woman who is not defined by her relationship with a man, but by her relationship with herself and everyone around her.
We all know that Kunis is dating celebrity douche Ashton Kutcher, the man who broke Demi Moore's heart. But the actress showed real chemistry with charming British reporter Chris Stark who interviewed her during her junket for the latest Oz ripoff. Watch it below. I have seen it about ten times.
Stark basically "Hugh Grants" his way through the entire interview, beguiling the gorgeous star and the world in the process. And Kunis gets major props for running with it, encouraging the adorably bumbling interview neophyte to keep the conversation off the rails.
Of the various blogs and stories I have read about this moment in pop culture history, the most interesting was by Vulture. The article details why Kunis and Jennifer Lawrence are America's new BFFs, while Anne Hathaway is the woman we'd like to see take her Oscar and go away. The link to that article is below.
So, basically it's just a matter of time before we are all making snarky comments about all the things we now love about Kunis and Lawrence, thanks to the ebb and flow of public opinion. But for now, the two actresses can bask in the stardom due to their girl next door likability. And in Stark, the Brits have a new journalism star who will hopefully ride that boy next door cuteness as far as it can take him.
Lifetime redeemed itself a bit this past week by pulling Drop Dead Diva from the ashes and granting the show a fifth season thanks to a little budget cutting. While there is no word when the new season will air, the show will most definitely be must-watch television when it returns, most likely this summer.
So much on the air is serious drama, police procedurals, reality ridiculousness or edgy comedy. This dramedy has its share of drama and can pull at the heart strings, but in that great Sleepless in Seattle way. After all, the premise is pure fluff...hot vacuous model named Deb dies by running her car into a fruit truck and comes back in the body of a smart lawyer named Jane who isn't a size zero.
But it's this premise that gives the show its heart and soul. Seeing Deb adjust to life while her ex-fiance and family move on without her provide the biggest moments of impact because of the central conceit--if Jane tells anyone that she is actually Deb, bad things will happen. Although thankfully this rule does not apply to her model best friend and confidante Stacy, the only one besides her guardian angel who knows her secret.
However, it never gets too soul searching--the point is not to solve any giant life problems, but to provide the audience with some cotton candy in a world that can be a carnival of errors.
The cast is game with the biggest name being gay icon, Margaret Cho, who does funny supporting work as Jane's assistant. The show has attracted a who's who of kitschy celebs including Joan Rivers, Rosie O'Donnell, Paula Abdul, Kim Kardashian, and Brandy. Plus the men seen below...Jackson Hurst, who plays the object of Jane's affection; Josh Stamberg, who plays her boss; and Ben Feldman, who plays her guardian angel.
I am, of course, saving the show's best asset for last. Brooke Elliott, who plays the titular heroine, is a marvel. It would have been easy to play this character too broadly. But Elliott somehow walks that tightrope of playing up Deb's vapid personality with an effervescent charm and heartbreaking sweetness and strength while proving her crack comic timing time and time again without reducing the character to caricature. Plus she can sing. The proof is in the pudding below.
The biggest mystery since the show premiered is why the actress didn't become a bonafide star as a result of the show. It's not because of her size--witness the heights that funny lady Melissa McCartney is currently climbing in Hollywood.
But I digress. If Elliott decides to not take on another project, we will always have the lasting joy of this show and her magnetic performance. Kudos to Lifetime for giving it a chance.
Be sure and catch the revamped Army Wives this weekend. The promo is below. Just don't make the mistake of finding out the reason Kim Delaney is leaving the show. This actress's fall into darkness is heartbreaking and this episode, in which the characters mourn the death of Delaney's Claudia Joy, promises to be a doozy.
The Pope has left the building! Actually, he hasn't left. He will continue to reside at the palace while his successor is chosen by the 115 cardinals, the majority of whom he appointed.
Can they fix the mess that is the Catholic Church? It looks doubtful, short term at least. With a tenure riddled by priest sex scandals, fewer priests and fewer followers, Benedict XVI does not leave behind a legacy to be admired. His successor has an uphill battle in overcoming these obstacles as well moving the Catholic Church into the 21st century. Simply creating a Twitter account will not make that happen.
Nor will it happen if it continues living in a time that does not exist. If the Catholic Church thinks it will thrive by resting its hopes on Caucasian straight men, it needs to think again. Women, LGBT, and other minorities are now a true force to be reckoned with in this day and age. While the Catholic Church faces problems that many other religious orders do (see Baptists), this is a time to really make Catholicism into a religion of the people.
It's not so far fetched. The basic tenants of the Catholic Church are solid. I'll even go along with transubstantiation which states one is actually eating the skin and blood of Christ when taking communion. But it has to stop acting like time has stood still.
Wishful thinking? Perhaps. But I'm just waiting for one mainstream religion to go down the path of enlightenment and actually follow the teachings of Christ rather than the words of men.
If this miracle were to happen with the Catholic Church, count me in on the first communion. My thoughts and prayers are with them.
The "Washington Post" has one of the most succinct articles written on where the Catholic Church is at during this transition.
The Oscars presented a tribute to the musicals, James Bond and Ben Affleck, the latter being the most honored snubbee in Academy history. This year's Oscars managed to entertain and (for the most part) not bore the audience during the entire four-hour running time.
There were flaws to be sure. Having the musicians play in another room (?) on a night honoring musicals led to sound issues for even the fantastic Adele. And while the Jaws music being used to play off winners with long speeches was inspired, all the Anne Hathaway haters wish it had been used for hers as well as for the "lesser" categories.
Also, in a night honoring musicals, it's amazing to think that only three were represented--Les Miserables, Dreamgirls and Chicago. At the very least, it would have made sense to do a musical montage with such greats as TheWizard of Oz, The Sound of Music, Moulin Rouge and even MammaMia.
And the James Bond tribute, which was hampered by not having the Bond actors show up due to various issues with the Bond family, would have been more rounded out by having Adele sing "Skyfall" right after Shirley Bassey sang "Goldfinger" just to keep it all in the OO7 realm.
And as per usual, the presenters were best when just presenting the awards without banter. The usually funny Melissa McCartney and Paul Rudd failed to land their witless lines. And I honestly have no clue what the cast of The Avengers were asked to do other than look good, which they did if you turned the TV on mute during their embarrassing award presentation.
But these are minor quibbles. Overall, the show was successful with a winning host (see my review of Mr. MacFarlane in another post) and a winning night.
Best Moments (apart from MacFarlane)
Shirley Bassey--Some singers just sing, but Bassey literally ripped into "Goldfinger" with such ferocity, I could see blood on her lips by the end. A great, over-the-top performance.
Anne Hathaway's final speech--The moment it ended, I breathed a dream of silent relief that we would not be subjected to her baby-voiced perkiness for a long while. I almost feel bad for hopping on the Hathaway-hater bandwagon, but if you can't fake sincerity, you probably shouldn't be working in Hollywood.
The Tribute to the Musicals--While Catherine Zeta Jones had a rough time of it, she looked great during the Chicago tribute. Jennifer Hudson, who I love, but won't sit through Smash for, dug into "I'm Telling You I'm Not Going" with the gusto only she and Jennifer Holliday can. And the Les Miz cast, including Russell Crowe, presented their movie with aplomb, with the beautiful Samantha Barks stealing the stage with her verse.
FLOTUS--First Lady Michelle Obama and Jack Nicholson present an award together. Legendary.
Adele--While her performance was hampered with sound issues, she sounded terrific. And when she won the award for best song, she reminded us why she is one of the most beloved entertainers in the world--she's just happy to be here.
Babs--Barbra Streisand took to the stage in a rare live performance to sing "The Way We Were" during the "In Memoriam" segment and reminded everyone that she is a star of the highest order, even when in recent years she has been languishing in movie duds like Meet the Fockers and The Guilt Trip.
Daniel Day-Lewis--Going in, everyone knew he would be charming and self-effacing during his acceptance speech, but who knew he was going to start doing comedy with perfect timing? Landing jokes about playing presenter Meryl Streep's Iron Lady, his urging Steven Spielberg not to make Lincoln a musical, and even poking fun at his method acting, Lewis presented a master class in giving a clever and for-the-ages acceptance speech.
Jennifer Lawrence--While I wait with bated breath for the backlash to begin (today's "Huffington Post" shows a picture of her possibly smoking weed--and so it begins), the actress charmed as usual. After falling up the stairs, she received a standing ovation to which she replied, "You all gave me a standing ovation because I fell and that is embarrassing, but thank you." And her behind the scenes press room interview was even funnier. The girl has an Oscar, two current movie franchises, and has directors clamoring to work with her. She has not yet begun to peak.
Argo--Ben Affleck's moving acceptance speech brought rainbow tears to my eyes. The best part was how he thanked his wife, Jennifer Garner-- "I want to thank my wife ... for working on our marriage for 10 Christmases. It is work, but it's the best kind of work. And there's no one I'd rather work with." Perfect ending to a solid night of entertainment and one of the best Oscar ceremonies in years (and yes, I'm pretending the last musical number with MacFarlane and Kristen Chenoweth did not happen).
Charming, funny and easy on the eyes, the Family Guy creator was probably the best host the Oscars could have hoped for in an awards season that took itself too seriously in which politics, both torture and Harvey Weinstein related, took center stage. And the mass criticism against his performance by everyone from police women in California to Hanoi Jane herself proved that maybe Hollywood has come to a point where it needs to check itself. It's entertainment, folks--not curing cancer.
MacFarlane's monologue was funny and biting, with Django Unchained being called the perfect Rihanna and Chris Brown date movie being one of his funniest jabs. His punchline about Jennifer Lawrence being glad that Meryl Streep wasn't nominated in her category, poking fun at the ridiculous controversy she stirred at the Golden Globes, was punctuated by a funny camera scan to the actress who laughed and put her head in her hands.
While I winced at William Shatner (at this point, who doesn't when Mr. Priceline comes on the screen), it led to some throwaway funny bits like "I Saw Your Boobs," in which MacFarlane sings a Mr. Skin song about actresses baring their bosoms in various roles. Of course, everyone, even the normally sound-minded "Huffington Post," decried the song as sexist. It was funny. Sure, he mentioned a couple of women in rape roles, but those same women picked up Oscars. So is it worse to pick up a statue for playing a rape victim or sing a song about it? It's acting. This just in--Jodie Foster and Hillary Swank were not actually raped, but their actual boobs were on display. We are such a sensitive bunch.
Still, it led to the very funny "I Saw Your Junk" featured below about actors who have dropped trou on film, so I'm happy the criticism led to something positive.
And his Flight parody with sock puppets led to the best sight gag of the night--socks in a dryer to simulate the folks in the plane being tumbled around. The Sally Field-Flying Nun bit was funny because the actress was so game and seemed to be one of many in the audience, including the usually stoic Tommy Lee Jones, who enjoyed MacFarlane's shtick.
The cherry on top of this well-executed monologue were the musical numbers. Channing Tatum and Charlize Theron need to book a dance movie stat. And Joseph Gordon-Levitt and Daniel Radcliffe were charming as always. But the real surprise, since I know little of MacFarlane's work, was that the man can sing and toe step with the best of them.
Overall, this was one of the longest but most enjoyable monologues in Oscar history. It also did a fantastic job of introducing a ceremony that focused on the movie musical (more of that during my actual review of the show itself).
MacFarlane also kept up his presence throughout the show, even announcing upcoming presenters before throwing it to commercial. Seeing an attractive guy tell the audience who's coming up on the show, versus some voice over the loud speakers as the camera pans the crowd as the Oscars usually does, was nicely inspired.
If I had one criticism, it's that MacFarlane didn't always have perfect comic timing in his joke delivery. But he was working with very funny material, got the jokes out in a disarming way and had me completely won over in the first five minutes. Unlike Ricky Gervais in his infamous Golden Globe hosting stints, MacFarlane's delivery focused on charm versus smarm.
It's too bad that hosting the Oscars is such a thankless job, because MacFarlane got the ratings and viewer support. In most of the polls, a vast majority of viewers would like to see him back next year. And for good reason--he was actually entertaining. While he was no Fey and Poehler or Neil Patrick Harris, who won accolades for hosting less stressful awards events, he was certainly better than any Oscar host since Johnny Carson (I'm sorry Billy Crystal, Whoopi Goldberg, David Letterman, Chris Rock, Hugh Jackman, Jon Stewart, Anne Hathaway and James Franco).
So to all of his critics, who need to quit being so sensitive, "You all are boobs, you all are boobs, I saw the Oscar show and you all are boobs."
The Scandal team plays matchmakers for a cute gay governor. Along with recurring actor Scott Foley, tonight's episode with Ugly Betty and The L Word alumni Eric Mabius and hottie TV regular Sam Page should prove for some additional eye candy along with the usual wacky soap opera asylum that is Scandal.
A rural Mississippi newspaper recently posted a front page story on the wedding of a lesbian couple, one of whom has been battling brain cancer. Rather than folks sending hopes and prayers for the ailing woman and congrats for the happy couple, the newspaper received a flurry of hate calls, letters, Facebook posts, etc. because they printed a story about LESBIANS.
Lock your doors. Hide the children's eyes. Burn all signs of this heinous event. There are lesbians getting married in Mississippi. Get thee to an exorcist post haste.
Thanks to a USM student named Ashton Pittman, the story went viral. And thankfully, the newspaper did take the high road and printed some of the negative letters along with the newspaper owner's own take on the "controversial" story (see below). The tide then turned and owner Jim Cegielski says he now receives 99 percent supportive phone calls and letters.
The takeaway is the good guys won. Sure bigots will always be bigots and they are entitled to freedom of speech to spout off whatever hatred they want. What's important is that more and more, people are being called out for being racist, homophobic, and misogynistic when they say hateful things regarding race, sexual preference or gender. And for this newspaper and this lesbian couple, the outpouring of support is a major step forward for Mississippi.
And when the LGBT community can start making progress in Mississippi, we can say we are definitely making progress.
Owner's response to the backlash:
We were well aware that the majority of people in Jones County are not in favor of gay marriage. However, any decent newspaper with a backbone can not base decisions on whether to cover a story based on whether the story will make people angry.
The job of a community newspaper is not pretending something didn't take place or ignoring it because it will upset people. No, our job is to inform readers what is going on in our town and let them make their own judgments. That is exactly what we did with the wedding story. Our reporter heard about the wedding, attended it, interviewed some of the participants and wrote a news story. If there had been protestors at the wedding, we would have covered that the exact same way … but there weren't any. We never said it was a good thing or a bad thing, we simply did our job by telling people what took place.
I took the bulk of the irate phone calls from people who called the paper to complain. Most of the complaints seem to revolve around the headline, "Historic Wedding," and the fact that we chose to put the story on the front page. My answer to the "Historic Wedding" headline is pretty simple. You don't have like something for it to be historic.
The holocaust, bombing of Pearl Harbor and the Black Sox scandal are all historic. I'm in no way comparing the downtown wedding of two females to any of those events (even though some of you made it quite clear that you think gay marriage is much worse).
We have stories about child molesters, murders and all kinds of vicious, barbaric acts of evil committed by heinous criminals on our front page and yet we never receive a call from anyone saying 'I don't need my children reading this.' Never. Ever. However, a story about two women exchanging marriage vows and we get swamped with people worried about their children.
Best Picture Silver Linings Playbook Zero Dark Thirty Amour Lincoln Django Unchained Life of Pi Argo Beasts of theSouthern Wild
Analysis: Due to the overwhelming support the film has received since Ben Affleck's snub heard around the world, Argo is the one to beat. Since the ridiculous controversy surrounding Zero Dark Thirty has knocked that film out of contention, Lincoln looks to be the only film standing in its way. My choice would be Silver Linings Playbook, but I'm a sucker for romance over military dramas, no matter the disparity of quality.
Best Actor
Bradley Cooper Silver Linings Playbook
Daniel Day Lewis Lincoln
Denzel Washington Flight
Hugh Jackman Les Miserables
Joaquin Phoenix The Master
Analysis: So many superlatives have been heaped on Lewis, he is THE only contender in this race. The others should just be happy to have been invited to the party to enjoy Lewis's speech, which if the many he has given throughout the long awards season are any indication, promises to be humble, charming, and worthy of the man he played.
Best Actress
Jennifer Lawrence Silver Linings Playbook
Jessica Chastain Zero Dark Thirty
Emmanuelle Riva Amour
Quvenzhane Wallis Beasts of the Southern Wild
Naomi Watts The Impossible
Analysis: I'm giving the edge to JLaw, although I don't know how much wishful thinking is playing into it. Other that Wallis, who was in diapers only a few years ago, the other actresses are definite possibilities. The Impossible was seen by too few, but Watts has earned a lot of respect in Hollywood. Chastain, who was a contender early on, seems to be one of the victims of the torture controversy surrounding her film. Riva is Lawrence's most formidable competition--she's old and this may be the Academy's last chance to honor her, while Lawrence will have many more chances to go to the podium. Still, a JLaw acceptance speech would undoubtedly be one of the most memorably loony speeches in Oscar history and she deserves it.
Best Supporting Actor
Tommy Lee Jones Lincoln
Alan Arkin Argo
Phillip Seymour Hoffman The Master
Robert DeNiro Silver Linings Playbook
Christoph Waltz Django Unchained
Analysis: It's tempting to go with Jones who would seem to be a lock for Lincoln. However, I'm making an outside-the-box choice and going with DeNiro. He's respected, but has been toiling in mostly dreck for the past two decades, starring in such "award" winners as The Adventures of Rocky and Bullwinkle and Meet the Fockers. This would be a golden affirmation of his talents and Hollywood loves a comeback kid. Waltz is an outside possibility, but his film is too polarizing. Hoffman and Arkin are terrific, but not even the highlights of their own films.
Best Supporting Actress
Anne Hathaway Les Miserables
Sally Field Lincoln
Jacki Weaver Silver Linings Playbook
Amy Adams The Master
Helen Hunt The Sessions
Analysis: This is a two-woman race between two of the perkiest contenders for decidedly unperky roles--Gidget herself, Sally Field, and Gidget wannabe, Anne Hathaway. While I have hated all of Hathaway's speeches throughout this awards season, would she really be any less annoying than Field, who gave the infamous, "You like me. You really, really like me" speech? It's Hathaway's to lose, but Field has a slim outside chance to swoop in like the Flying Nun and take the "dream" away.
Best Director
Michael Haneke Amour
Ang Lee Life of Pi
David O. Russell Silver Linings Playbook
Steven Spielberg Lincoln
Benh Zeitlin Beasts of the Southern Wild
Analysis: With Affleck out, Spielberg will most likely emerge the president of this category. His only competition is Lee, who received an Oscar for Brokeback Mountain even though that film was robbed of best picture by the mind numbingly awful Crash. Life of Pi is an international hit, grossing nearly an astounding $600 million worldwide and much of the film's success has been credited to Lee's vision.
With an unpredictable host in Seth McFarlane, a nod to movie musicals, and live performances by Jennifer Hudson, Barbra Streisand and Adele, this promises to be one of the most entertaining telecasts in recent history. I'll be watching the champagne flow and the Golden boys go with pizza, beer, and rainbow tears cheering as Hollywood celebrates its own on the most glamorous night of the year.
It was the spoiler everyone in America knew ahead of time. Downton Abbey's leading man, Dan Stevens, left the show for greener pastures, leading to his character being killed off in a car accident in the show's third season finale. I respect anybody for moving on, but this is a top-rated show at the heighth of its popularity, making his exit seem a little premature. Still, whatever grousing fans of the show may have, I wish Mr. Stevens luck in future endeavors.
One of the few men who look as good in clothes as out of them, here are a few of the finest glamour shots showcasing his classic British cheekbones and gorgeous eyes.
Of course, he doesn't look bad without his shirt either.
Lifetime, known as the television network for women and gay men, has become the Sybil of television networks. Nancy Dubuc became president of the network in April of 2010 and things have slowly gone downhill with few rays of light since.
The airing of "Liz and Dick" remains the least of its flaws as Lindsay Lohan is the current trash queen. And Lifetime movies are typically trashy, guilty pleasures with a few exceptions noted later.
But the network seemed to be making real inroads towards legitimacy with such shows as "Army Wives" and the fabulous "Drop Dead Diva," that seemed to point towards having shows that, while not perfect, would be awardworthy if on any other channel. For example, "Diva" star Brooke Elliott (below) should have been nominated for every award possible every single year her show aired.
However, it was recently announced that "Diva" has been cancelled, despite solid ratings, and "Wives" is undergoing a major cast upheaval and retooling, despite being one of the network's highest-rated programs.
Instead, the future of the network seems to focus on such shows as "The Client List," about a prostitute HEADLINED by "Oscar-winning" actress Jennifer Love-Hewitt, featured in typical costume below. This falls right in line with the trash Lifetime has historically offered, but the network could be so much more.
Witness the network's recent celebration of Black History Month. It featured a movie about Coretta Scott King starring Angela Bassett and Mary J. Blige. Another movie in the series starred Toni Braxton in the surprisingly beautiful multi-denominational love story, "Twist of Fate."
And this is why the network remains completely frustrating. It would be easy to write this network off as trash T.V., but then it goes and hires an all-star cast of fantastic black actresses for a new version of "Steel Magnolias." While the new version paled in comparison, it at least showed that the network wants to be more than a guilty pleasure.
I hope Lifetime remembers that the few pieces of classy and entertaining programming it has offered are what the network should want to be known for--not just to be the latest stomping grounds for movies about accused murderesses Casey Anthony and Amanda Knox. If Lifetime is indeed a network for women, then it needs to quit being so misogynistic and feature entertainment about strong women like Mrs. Martin Luther King, Jr. or entertaining, vibrant women like "Diva's" Jane Bingham. I have a dream for Lifetime, but sadly, the network is living the nightmare.
Hear the gorgeous Brooke Elliott singing Jason Mraz's "Lucky" below. She sings, she dances, and, thanks to Lifetime, she needs a job!
While this past week's "Glee" was the typical trainwreck (snoozy Marley and Jake, prostitute Brody, pregnant Rachel, lesbian Santana and Quinn), it was a good Kurt and Blaine episode. The following GIF from their brief makeout scene was the highlight along with Kurt's one-liner to Tina about "vapo-raping" Blaine when Tina confessed to rubbing VapoRub on Blaine's chest when he had a cold.
And it also had the fantastic "Not Getting Married Today" from the musical "Company" sung by the great, if normally ill-used, Jayma Mays.
Florida Senator Marco Rubio drew mass derision and mocking for his speech after the President's State of the Union in which he awkwardly goes off camera for a bottle of water to take a drink. More people were talking about this moment than anything in President Obama's solid, if unspectacular, speech. But then Rubio, painted as the doofus of the week, did something out of left field--he made lemonade out of his own "Watergate."
Rubio actually went on to sell bottles of water (see the picture below), going on to raise $100,000 for his PAC. Pure genius. Of course, he did have to add a strange defense of his behavior, blaming the whole thing on God and his Fozzie the Bear-like sense of humor.
Still, the bottled water idea is the type of inspired thinking America needs more of in this country--thinking outside the box. While I support few of Rubio's ideas, this was truly inspired. Bottled water sales aside, the Republicans may want to think twice before making him the Republican nominee in 2022.
Infamous Vice President nominee Sarah Palin had to be coached like a Kindergarten student through her debate practice. However, during the debates themselves, despite not having an original thought in her head other than a silly one liner, she handled herself without sweatily gulping a water bottle. When Palin makes you look like an idiot by comparison, it's time to just stay silent and suck your bottle in private.
If you have been living under a rock and missed the funny Rubio moment, see it below.
Apologies for the absence. While I don't have a note from my doctor or mother, I share these very funny, and real, absence excuses.
"Maryann was absent December 11-16, because she had a fever, sore throat, headache and upset stomach. Her sister was also sick, fever and sore throat, her brother had a low grade fever and ached all over. I wasn’t the best either, sore throat and fever. There must be something going around, her father even got hot last night."
"Please excuse Gloria. She has been sick and under the doctor."
"Please excuse my daughter's absence. She had her periodicals."
And finally, "James can't go to work today. Please execute him."
Brett Ratner, the man behind such movie "classics" as the Rush Hour films, Tower Heist, and Red Dragon, is set to create a TV animated series based on the popular Facebook game, Farmville. If it isn't interactive, will people actually watch?
Click on the link below for full details of this "brilliant" idea if you dare.
Perhaps due to the flack that the FCC has given CBS in the past, the network, which is airing the Grammy awards this Sunday, has issued the following memo to award attendees:
CBS Program Practices advises that all talent appearing on camera please adhere to Network policy concerning wardrobe. Please be sure that buttocks and female breasts are adequately covered. Thong type costumes are problematic. Please avoid exposing bare fleshy under curves of the buttocks and buttock crack. Bare sides or under curvature of the breasts is also problematic. Please avoid sheer see-through clothing that could possibly expose female breast nipples. Please be sure the genital region is adequately covered so that there is no visible "puffy" bare skin exposure. Please avoid commercial identification of actual brand name products on T-shirts. Foreign language on wardrobe will need to be cleared. OBSCENITY OR PARTIALLY SEEN OBSCENITY ON WARDROBE IS UNACCEPTABLE FOR BROADCAST. This as well, pertains to audience members that appear on camera. Finally, The Network requests that any organized cause visibly spelled out on talent's wardrobe be avoided. This would include lapel pins or any other form of accessory.
Side breasts? Jennifer Lopez will definitely have to stay home or go to Nunneries R Us for her dress (see Exhibit A below). Lapel pins that represent a cause? Leave your pink and red ribbons at home because CBS doesn't want audiences to know you support cancer or AIDS awareness. Brand names of any kind? Thank God Mariah Carey can leave her Coca Cola cup she drinks out of on "American Idol" at home. I mean does anybody actually believe the diva is actually drinking Coke?
And I don't even know what the keeping genitals covered so that there is no "puffy" skin exposure means. If you have visible puffy skin around your genitals, get thee to a doctor immediately.
Although I was on the fence about watching the awards show, I'm curious to see what Christina Aguilera or Rihanna will wear since CBS essentially described their entire wardrobe. Or perhaps, the celebs will defy the network for issuing such a ridiculous memo and break every rule. It could make for a very interesting drinking game.
Tony Goldwyn, the man best known for playing the jerk who shot Patrick Swayze in "Ghost," is now steaming up the small screen as the president screwing the gorgeous and commanding Kerry Washington in "Scandal."
The show, which airs tonight at 10 PM on ABC, promises to be explosive as everything regarding the election rigging comes out in the open. As intriguing as the scandals are on the show, it's the red-hot chemistry of Washington and Goldwyn that is the primary draw of this political soap opera. Oh, and Goldwyn at the age of 50 looks better shirtless than men half his age.
Ryan Murphy, that most eccentric of television auteurs, currently has three shows on the air ("American Horror Story" recently ended its run, but has been renewed for a third season). All three shows ("Glee," "The New Normal," and "AHS") have brilliant moments that transcend any show on the air, but also have episodes which rank as the worst television has to offer. "Glee" airs tonight and the following is an analysis of a show in desperate need of creative C.P.R.
What's Bad--"Glee" is having its worst season ever with the wobbly transition from last year's graduation of many of its characters. Kurt and Rachel are in New York, Puck is in L.A., Santana, Mercedes and Quinn are somewhere, and Finn is teaching the "Glee" class with no credentials whatsoever. Aside from Finn, all of these characters regularly stalk the halls of McKinley High.
This conceit is forgiven, however, because every new character introduced this year is annoying and one dimensional. Marley has an eating disorder. Jake is in love with her (he has no other distinguishing attribute other than this and being Puck's brother). Ryder looks good without his shirt. Kitty is vitriol in a cheer leading outfit.
"Glee" is capable of good casting. Darren Criss was a stellar addition with his "Teenage Dream" entrance. And the core ensemble including Emmy-winners Jane Lynch and Chris Colfer are talented. But the casting director must have been blind and deaf with this new lot.
It may not be the new cast's fault. The writing on "Glee" has always been a problem, with characters changing personalities from week to week, but this year the writing is absolutely laughable.
Just a few examples: Tina is in love with gay Blaine, a storyline that would feel right at home in the 1980's. Marley and Jake are quite possibly the most boring T.V. couple ever, but the show insists on shoving them down our throats like Marley shoved her fingers down her throat in multiple episodes this season. New York has not tempered Rachel's diva behavior, which is fine, but now she's saddled with a dull dreamboat who is written as a cypher whose only purpose is to smile, nod and take off his shirt every episode.
These are just a sampling of the weekly tomatoes being thrown at the audience every week. And shame on them for the song theft, although stealing a cover of "Baby Got Back" is not highway robbery.
What's Good--The music. A "Glee" cover is almost always enjoyable and a great "Glee" cover goes to my I-Pod immediately. Criss's cover of "It's Time" by Imagine Dragons is quite possibly the best cover in the history of covers.
The show does boast eye candy of every sort. Chord Overstreet and, especially Criss, ooze that "it" factor, even when their characters do not. See below: Chord top, Darren bottom.
Finally, the production value of the musical numbers remain top notch. The "Divas" cover tonight, for instance, is fantastic. See below.
Advice to Ryan Murphy: scrap the new cast members and focus on the old. This will at least make fans of the show happy again, even if they have to contend with the typical third-grade writing that "Glee" has been mostly saddled with from the beginning.
Finally, why do I watch if I am so annoyed with it on a weekly basis? It's because "Glee" has the parts, but the show is not currently the sum of them. It's broken, but can be fixed and every week I hope for an episode as profound as when Kurt and Blaine finally got together. This is proof that the show can achieve perfection. I'll leave you with that perfection and the hope that "Glee" will achieve it again.
Enterprise Florida, an organization promoting job growth, is coming under fire for its logo featured below: "FLORIDA: the Perfect Climate for Business."
Notice the I is a tie. People are decrying it as sexist, but if you have to choose an article of clothing to represent business, what else would you use? They could have made the A a dress, but then folks would still be up in arms that women wear the pants in the business world now. Men's clothing have traditionally stood for business (i.e. white collar, blue collar, etc.) So it's all much ado about nothing and calling attention to it is more sexist than the motto itself.
The problem with it IS the motto. Although it's clever because Florida has a mostly ideal climate weather-wise, the state is not known for being open to business. Jacksonville could have been the place where Hollywood was built, but the church knocked that down. Land-based casinos are still but a dream because the church knocks those down. Building is not happening, not because of churches, but because Florida is in the top five foreclosure states in America.
So as much as I would like to think that Florida has the "perfect climate" for business, history has proven otherwise. But maybe organizations like Enterprise Florida can change that. Until then, let's concentrate on the I being a tie, because after all, with jobless rates and the economy being the way it is, that is obviously what really matters to America.
"Nashville," the underwatched series created by "Thelma and Louise" scribe, Callie Khouri, is a show that is fantastic when it's running on all cylinders and a poor man's "Knot's Landing" when it isn't. Of all the offerings on Wednesdays, especially "American Idol" as it moves into the boring Hollywood weeks before the actual competition, "Nashville" should be the number one choice for viewers. Five reasons are below.
Connie Britton--The actress can be fantastic with the right material ("Friday Night Lights, certain episodes of "American Horror Story") and blah with bad material ("Spin City" and certain episodes of "American Horror Story"). This role gives her the material in which she excels--smart, spunky, take no prisoners. And she runs with it, stealing the show from the rest of the cast, even though she is the worst singer on a show about music. That's acting.
The basic premise--Throw away all the sometimes irritating subplots (political campaigns, alcohol-abusing mamas) and relish the central focus--imagine Taylor Swift and Faith Hill going on tour. One is a young starlet who scores hit after hit and the other is an aging music legend who can't buy a hit. The best scenes are between Britton and Hayden Panittiere and they crackle with an addictive "All About Eve" punch.
The music--A show featuring an insider's view of the country music industry rises and falls on the music and the show doesn't disappoint. The show's music producer is Khouri's real-life husband, T-Bone Burnett, who is a Grammy and Oscar winner for music in such films as "Oh Brother, Where Art Thou" and "Crazy Heart." His work in film shows as he chooses music that works to the actors' and the story's strengths. As mentioned, Britton isn't a fantastic singer, but Burnett is able to cover the flaws in her voice with songs that work for her.
Supporting cast--Chip Esten, Eric Close, Claire Bowen, Jonathan Jackson, Powers Boothe, and, yes, the cheerleader from "Heroes" herself, Panittiere, do the most with the material they are given. Boothe, in particular, is stuck in a thankless part as Britton's father, but he does bring a scary realism to it.
The men--While the show doesn't exploit its' cast's genetic awesomeness to its fullest potential, the men on the show definitely give good chest. But for the love of God, give Close a shirtless scene now--the audience would be more invested in the love triangle between him, Britton, and the often shirtless Esten.
Below in order, top to bottom: Chip Esten, Jonathan Jackson, Sam Palladino, and Eric Close.
"Nashville" is far from a perfect show, but unlike "Smash" which premiered last night, it achieves such musical heights when it hits that it is worth consuming every flawed minute of the country soap opera with heart and twang.
The hottest 26 year old playing a senior in high school on television. While his show is in a creative funk, Darren Criss keeps me watching the train wreck that is "Glee" every week. I should be mad, but who cannot love this fabulousness?
Parenting is a tough job. So it's difficult to criticize moms and dads (unless they are Honey Boo Boo's parents or the Dance Moms). But Dara-Lynn Weiss calling her child obese, putting her on a strict diet and then talking about it to "Vogue" certainly puts her in the category of bad parents who deserve a spanking or, at least, a long time out.
The idea is sound. Parents should be aware of their childrens' nutrition as well as their physical activity. The idiot parents who sued McDonald's because the restaurant made them fat are on the other side of the spectrum. Side note--does anyone eat a Big Mac and think it's health food? However, calling a child fat and reporting the child's weight loss in a magazine for public consumption is a call to action.
Weiss's child is destined for an eating disorder and years of therapy due to her mother's actions which seem more selfish than in the best interests of her daughter. Instead of doing what any sane parent would do and deal with this privately, she is airing before and after pictures of her daughter, calling her obese in the media, and saying that any of her detractors are too "sensitive."
Diets are good, although the word healthy lifestyle seems better since diets rarely work and changing your lifestyle to incorporate healthy eating, exercise, and portion control is something all of us should do. Parents who give their children cookies all day or take them to McDonald's too often are doing their kids a grave disservice.
The main problem is that she aired it. In this world of oversharing (see this blog), it's okay for Ms. Weiss to detail her personal struggles of weight loss, but her seven year old's? She may argue that she is doing it for other families, but if you watch her on the video below, it's clear she is not being altruistic in telling her child's story.
Honey Boo Boo may grow up to be a lovely adult and Ms. Weiss's child may be fine, but rather than protecting kids from the F-Bomb, shouldn't we be more concerned with parents who use their kids for fame and fortune. Or do we have to see more kids go the way of JonBenet Ramsey before something is finally done? Shame on "Vogue" and shame on Weiss. You get the Dirty Diaper of the Week award.
Former Sexiest Man Alive Bradley Cooper and "Titanic" (I know he's done some movies since) star Leonardo DiCaprio were recently photographed like this:
There are many logical explanations why the two actors appear shirtless and look like they have just woken up, with Cooper's hair a tossled mess and DiCaprio's eyes needing a Botox refresher from Nicole Kidman's doctor. But it's just too odd in a good way.
While Cooper can come across as very effiminate and light weight, he takes chances with tough roles like "The Elephant Man" and is just so darn affable. He laughed off his Sexiest Man Alive honor, but more importantly, agreed with the millions of women and gay men that it should have been bestowed on Ryan Gosling that year.
Gay cred: Had a pretty graphic gay sex scene (no nudity) in "Wet Hot Summer."
Leo is a star everyone seems to love. Most recently, the great Daniel Day Lewis said he took the role in "Lincoln" at the urging of DiCaprio. While I think his "Gilbert Eating Grapes" greatness is long gone, DiCaprio does have every great director clamoring to work with him so he doesn't embarrass himself with his performances.
Gay cred: He dropped trou as a gay man in "Total Eclipse" and played the gay J. Edgar Hoover in "J. Edgar," however the affair was downplayed a bit.
So, I'm going to drop the snark for one minute and say if these two cute dudes are boyfriends, I'm thrilled. They both are in good shape, friends of the LGBT community and seem like nice guys in real life. While I don't think we can expect to see them walk down the red carpet holding hands anytime soon, let them come to the balcony shirtless after "sleeping" anytime they need some air.
